Wednesday, April 30

Dad's poem

my dad wrote this poem. he used a short story of mine as his inspiration.

nothing was there

brown tie his loosen
polished amonia
gibberish terrif
alleys catching up to me
bitch like a stung hollered bolted
ross honk
ed cars
screeched skin
flesh te aring
my self over crotch
tree trunks
watermelons pointe
nose smiling a wrapped a
behind a wall hidden torture toys
on the ground bl
ood i
breathed cold air conditioned air
initial surge died hobbled
halls my waist no
clean wrists
fogged memory
of me take care
nothing was there
swung head i my on
e floor
keep movingflatonmyback
i couldn't hear anyone
my feet at saw him
it ended
and i was a gorilla
playing three decker c
head floating down in cement
winning money

- gishi bian
- robert payne
30 april 2008

well your revised edition of this paper was again full of images
i could use!
it was a completely different paper
thoughtful changes
well done
i noted it was a bit longer
it seemed like a slice of turkey from the breast
just a eye into a longer piece
leaves one wondering and wanting more
i hope you like my poetic version
i started from the end
and went up
reversed some things and added an ending
comments welcome
love love love dad

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